TODAY IN FLU ENVY:
So as we all have been observing, the flu is bad this season. It has attacked our friends and coworkers and took them down for weeks at a time, in some cases paring with sinus and ear infections to really get the job done. It's likely that you yourself suffered from the flu already this season. I have not. Does this make me happy? No, it does not. Because it means that the fucking thing might still be on its way, waiting for me to make a fatal mistake before it pounces.
But in the meantime, apparently jealous of all the people who are legitimately sick, I went ahead and ate half a container of humus last night and woke up with the most hideous stomach ache of my life.
So sick I am, but of my own doing.
This might just be the chance that flu was looking for.
UPDATE: I think it was a 24 hour bug and not the humus....possible the flu won this time.