Thursday, May 07, 2009


Dreaming has always been all or nothing for me. Either I pass out and suddenly it's morning, or I have 400 year long specific dreams that seem to be trying to tell me something. Or at least entertain me. Here are the last three I had- anyone got any ideas?

1) I am stuck on a snowy mountain top, trapped, with a bunch of mountain climbers after an avalanche put us in peril. I am new to the scene however, because I don't like climbing mountains, so I guess I just showed up one day like "hey guys- stuck on a mountain? Cool." We knew help was on the way but we didn't know how long we'd been up there so I pulled out my lap top and looked at the clock date. The dates spun rapidly to my horror as I finally realized 3 years had gone by and it was 2012.
MEANING: I hate winter?

2) I am in jail about to be executed for...wait for it...performing long form improv comedy. (I didn't get the deets) I talked to the two guards and convinced them that killing me over such a ridiculous crime was not all right , and got their assurance that they would help me escape. A judge shows up and tells me I am going to be executed and asks me if I want to call Justin. I struggle with the idea of calling him and wasting escape time or not calling him and running the risk of actually being executed with out telling him where I was. Apparently improv crime prosecution works fast. So I realize that the guards are going to back out so I wait for them to open the door to my cell (which is by the way, a Liberal Arts College classroom with a door out on a quad) and then I beat them over the head with an empty plastic bottle and into submission. I can't remember what happened next, but I think they let me go legally, despite the horrific violence. And I am pretty sure I was on Sarah Lawrence Campus for the whole thing. Or a combo of SLC and Walnut Hill, this acting school I got into when I was 16 but couldn't afford to attend.MEANING: Plastic bottles are bad for the environment?

3) Zombie/Vampires were loose and we were all in hiding against them. We quickly realized that the only way to kill them was to slit their throats, which is kind of a close contact sport. I found myself in a huge crowd of them and started slitting here and there. I realized that the best thing for me to do was to let them bite me, because you have a little bit of time before you turn into one, and since I was already bitten I could use that time for more throat slashing. So I let one bite me and then I quickly cut all there throats and then in a genius move, slit MY OWN THORAT which let the zombie/Vampire blood out but I guess it did it in eye sight of an EMT because they just bandaged my throat up and I was all good.
MEANING: Don't watch Law and Order before bed?

This is what I really think.
1) I am worried that time is flying and I am getting nothing done.
2) I am afraid my ambition to be a comedian is a waste of time.
3) Fighting against sharing my work with other people who don't immediately love it.

Boooring. I have too much time alone with my brain.

My new dream is to own a bowie knife like that one above. Look at that magic blade!

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