Tuesday, December 02, 2008


We all hate people, especially people we don't know. And of course, we most hate people we don't know on the subway because we might be trapped in a moving box or underground station with a scary starer, over talker, smelly belly, train pusher-underer, or just your everyday psychopathic teenager (why are they so loud??!!).

So imagine my horror this morning on the C train platform (little known fact- the C is the G train of blue trains!) when out of the corner of of eye I realized there was a stranger standing directly. behind. me.

They were about as far away from me as a boyfriend might stand behind a girlfriend right before he protectively throws an arm around her belly OR a train pusher-underer right before they psychotically throw a pushing you on to the train arm out.

Now, There was plenty of room on the station platform on either side, and so this was a disturbing, even threatening move by this stranger (with or with out candy. I didn't/don't care).

I turned my head slightly to get a better look. The stranger, out of the corner of my eye, appeared to be a short, teen or early 20's Asian girl. For obvious reasons this deepened my terror. I knew I had to act. My heart pounded as I spun around and faced....

...the giant head of Will Smith on a Seven Pounds movie poster 6 feet away from me.

Well, you can see why I was confused:

Oh wait. No you can't. That doesn't make any sense.

Even worse, five seconds later I was fooled again.

Has anyone else experienced this phenomenon? If you have please post at:


STARTLING UPDATE: Today at my office two late teens/early 20's Asian woman I HAVE NEVER SEEN BEFORE walked into my room and stood for MORE THEN FIVE MINUTES in my blind spot talking quietly to themselves.

I want you to know that I reached into my pen cup slipped a pair of scissors into my lap JUST IN CASE. I am not kidding. The scissor handles are blue.


natalie said...

I heart the c train

lucas said...

Be careful not to stab any life-sized Hancock cutouts at work...

or any coworkers. don't stab them either.

how soon can I expect you to wear a headband with a small rear-view mirror alldayeveryday?