TODAY IN CRUSHING LONELINESS/BRAIN ISSUES:
As some of you know I work in a small TV production company doing something. The show we have been producing (Pressure Cook!) has finally wrapped and the final episodes were delivered this week. This means that all the AP's, production coordinators, editors, and producers are no longer at the office. Which consequently means I am the only one left.
It is really weird to be all alone in an office. There is no one to joke around with, no one to get on my nerves, no one to get coffee with. There is no one to hate behind their backs, no one to text message insults across the room, and no one to tell me I am super hot/an asshole, as all my co-workers have had want to do at some points.
It's also really really tiring. I have never been more exhausted from a work day then I have this week. Its because all the thoughts in my brain, which usually come spilling out in random and oft amusing if not inappropriate ways, are just stuck in there, flying around and around and then burying themselves into my subconscious. The old brain can only take so much.
When I do finally get to talk to some one it usually comes out incorrectly/like an insane person. Today as I dropped off some Christmas presents to our network I ran into one of the big-shot producers who I constantly send things to , but have never seen. She has the same name as a different woman I used to work with and for a long time I had thought they were the same person. I had even sent an email to her that said "Hey S----------, my name is Phaea Crede. I think we worked together on B-----------!", and never got a response. Later I found out that this S-------- was not the S---------- I had worked with and got sort of embarrassed. But nothing to could beat my embarrassment as today when I finally met S--------- face to face:
S--------: Oh Phaea, hi! I think we've exchanged some emails.
Phaea: Oh yah. I used...to think you were another person. But then I found out you weren't.
(Cut to S-------- staring in confusion and horror.)
Phaea: (con't) That came out...wrong I meant that....(At this point my brain shut down to prevent me from remembering the incident and I honestly have no memory of what I said to S-------)
(S-------- leaves very quickly.)
Phaea: (to the receptionist sitting at her right) I've been walking around Soho all day.
If you take a look at that last line you will realize that it in no way explains anything at all, and is perhaps the best part of the conversation in that it proves that I was beginning to just say things for the fun of it.
Good god. I need a semi-friendly co-worker! Where's Jonathan Morse at!??